Football returns to a balmy London Stadium. Nigel and myself have opted for shorts, while Matt is in his final game at the Boleyn t-shirt. Lisa and CQ make up our number with Michael the Whovian away polishing his Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart and UNIT anecdotes. Matt and are already mainlining football, having seen the West Ham Under-18s lose to Arsenal in the morning.
The big miss for all us is Fraser, who has departed for the great pub-rock gig in the sky. As a Moyes sceptic he would have appreciated seeing the first game of a new gaffer.
Meet the New West Ham, same as the old West Ham. The line-up is a bit disappointing, featuring only Kilman and Rodriguez of the new signings.
It's a poor start as Soucek miscontrols to give away a needless corner after four minutes. From the resulting corner Onana loses Antonio and heads home far too easily. West Ham look sluggish. Is it too soon to say "Lopetegui out!" we wonder. It's almost two for Villa as Rogers wriggles through to force a fine low save from Areola. Plus we've got the sun in our eyes.
A simple ball over the top sees Bailey get behind Emerson, round the onrushing Areola and hit the post, put off a little by a good recovery from Kilman. Then it's McGinn's turn to fire just wide from the edge of the area. Bowen can't get in the game and Antonio is struggling up front, though Kudus does impress with some mazy dribbles. The bloke behind us says his under-ten side can pass it better than this lot. Strange the board haven't appointed him as gaffer.
West Ham receive an unexpected lifeline when Paqueta chips into the box. Soucek goes down like a felled conifer under a challenge from Cash and after a VAR check the penalty is given. Nigel suggests it's a "penalty Czech". It's very soft as Cash has got a toe to the ball. Paqueta does his usual stop-start jump and skip and fires home a calmly-taken spot-kick before giving thanks to the heavens. At the end of the half Emerson goes close with a low shot that Martinez has to turn past the post.
West Ham start the second half with greater intent as the crowd fire them up with "West Ham are Massive!" Coufal gets in a fine cross but Antonio heads over when well-placed.
When Emery brings on Duran for Villa, whom West Ham have been trying to sign, Matt suggests we know what's going to happen next. Lopetegui acts after 73 minutes bringing on on Fullkrug, Summerville and Ward-Prowse. The fact J-Lo takes off Bowen and Paqueta shows he's not scared of subbing big names.
GOALS ON FILM
But it's the Villa subs who have the greater impact. Duran has already fired into the side-netting. On 79 minutes Maatsen gets away down the left with Coufal not tight enough on him. He plays it first-time to Ramsey who sets up Duran. The Columbian striker, presumably still Hungry Like the Wolf, fires through Areola's legs with a crisp finish. No sign of a crossed Hammers gesture as he celebrates.
Lopetegui brings on Todibo (who looks like a man mountain) and Danny Ings with five minutes to go. 'Jimmy' Summerville is a real danger on the left, taking men on and getting in a fine cross for Ings' header to force a flying save from Martinez.
The Irons very nearly force an undeserved point at the end of added time. Summerville chips across the box to Kudus, whose cross is met by Soucek's header. Konsa manages to block the header but the ball spins to Soucek again, who swivels to fire over under pressure from Konsa.
We trudge off to the Eagle, where Sinead has East London Pale Ale, Corona, John Smith's, non-alcoholic Guinness and Tayto crisps ready for us. At least the jukebox caters for fans of a certain age, though thankfully there's no Duran Duran. Rod Stewart is followed by Nigel's second favourite Dire Straits song Telegraph Road. As Back in the USSR comes on the jukebox CQ tells us that Paul McCartney wrote it as a parody of the Beach Boys, the Californian outfit who famously sang "Birmingham's a s***hole I wanna go home" (or something like that) on Sloop John B.
Nigel is reluctant to leave while Metallica is playing but has introduced us to some world class trivia, asking which goalkeeper has played for both Bury and Bury St Edmonds? It is in fact Nick Pope. All of this is better than thinking about the game.
It's only one game in but it's never good to lose your first match. This looks like a season too far for the 33-year-old Antonio and Fullkrug needs to start. Lopetegui should also bring in Wan-Bissaka and Todibo if that's his favoured defence, while Summerville looks too good to leave out. We've missed the injured Alvarez too. Let's see what happens when the new signings are better integrated, but a rapid improvement is required.
PLAYER RATINGS: Areola 6; Coufal 5 (Todibo 5), Kilman 6, Mavropanos 5, Emerson 6; Rodriguez 5 (Ings 6), Soucek 6, Paqueta 6 (Ward-Prowse 5); Kudus 7, Bowen 5 (Summerville 7), Antonio 5 (Fullkrug 5).
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