“It all seems too
promising, the sun’s shining, we’re all expecting a thrashing,” opines Matt
with the eye of a seasoned West Ham watcher.
In Ken’s Café
there’s time for a quick cup of tea and KitKat with Big Phill, Big Joe, Matt,
Michael and Iain Dale, fresh from his Sullivan exclusive making the red-tops and the Guardian, before rushing for
the 12.45 kick off. Though Michael does have time to lean across the counter and give Carol a kiss.
In the stadium Palace fire a
shot wide in the first minute when they should have scored and it’s clear
we’re out of sorts. Palace could be 3-0 up at half-time.
ENGLAND'S ENGLAND'S NUMBER TWO!
Super Robert Green
makes two good saves from long range strikes by Martin and then from Jedinak
and surpasses himself with a great tip over of Zaha’s deflected shot. We try to get down to the usual ten men. Tomkins gets a knock on the head goes off briefly and returns looking groggy.
Matt normally doesn’t swear until the 70th minute but he’s seen too much after half an hour here. “How can we not take a f***ing throw-in? Jesus! Vaz Te can’t control it! Take him off! Collison!! What’s Reid doing? He’s worse than Faubert!”
Matt normally doesn’t swear until the 70th minute but he’s seen too much after half an hour here. “How can we not take a f***ing throw-in? Jesus! Vaz Te can’t control it! Take him off! Collison!! What’s Reid doing? He’s worse than Faubert!”
We know the real
cause. Nigel has deserted his chums to take up a position in an executive box
with one of his non-brawling MP mates. We remember him when he was just a poor
kid in the East End of Brentwood. And he’s probably predicted a cricket score
over white wine and canapés.
On the left Vaz Te
looks like one of those flair players who are either brilliant or terrible, but nothing
in between. Reid has a nightmare and gets everything wrong for the first 45
minutes, McCartney is being outpaced by Zaha, Tomkins isn’t mobile enough for
midfield at home, Faubert is isolated out wide while Maynard has no service.
Only Faye saves us with some great last-ditch challenges.
BALDOCK'S CUNNING PLAN
We improve a
little in the second half as Cole replaces Faubert. Later O’Neil replaces the
foundering Vaz Te and Baldock, on for Maynard, almost scores with his first
shot, a low shot saved by Speroni’s legs. Cole scuffs another good chance
wide. Our best chance comes from a great Cole layoff that Baldock strikes low
again only to bring out another fine save from the Palace keeper.
McCartney plays
Zaha quite well in the second half but Palace still look dangerous on the break
and we agree that we should take the point as we’ve played so poorly. We might
even be missing the captain’s influence of Nolan, dare it be said.
Despite some late
corners and muffed crosses we never really look like scoring though it’s good
the crowd stay with the Hammers even as we pump hopeful balls towards Cole. Collison can't pass it straight after a good first ten minutes. The
Palace fans are more concerned with chanting about Millwall than us. Maybe
these early kick-offs are just bad for our bio-rhythms. Might Ravel Morrison provide the creativity Noble and Tomkins lack in midfield?
TIRED OF LIFE AT THE TOP
The whole side
looks terribly jaded after Blackpool and afterwards Allardyce tries to put it down to tiredness,
though as someone points out Birmingham have already played 43 games and aren’t
tired at all. Yet we're so tired it's unbelievable.
“The unbeaten run
continues,” says Fraser as the whistle blows.
Best part of the
day is a trip to the Newham Bookshop to buy Jeremy Nicholas’s Mr Moon Has Left the Stadium and then a trip to the Black Lion, where there’s Captain Bob from
the cask in the back bar. And there's Phil Whelans the man quoted on the back of Jeremy's book.
Nigel and CQ
arrive at the Black Lion, possibly by helicopter, and say the massage and
grape-feeding are top notch in the corporate sections.
“At least we got
in the box…” sighs Nigel.
“Which is more
than West Ham did,” comes my retort, as we prepare for the inevitable Southampton win at Watford and second place.
4 comments:
Weird game yesterday, never really got going and despite feeling optimistic on the way there, once we kicked off I felt it was going to be one of those frustrating afternoons.
Maynard was isolated in the first half although Carlton made a difference when he came on but the biggest problem was the ref who did us no favours by not sending anyone off.
Agree about the ref! Cole made a difference and at least Baldock got in scoring positions. And we need Taylor's crosses too..
It did look like a tired performance. Poor old Noble looked dead on his feet. Interesting 'Screen Break' back page of todays Guardian Sport section. Mentioning how Noble is following the new penchant for hairstyles inspired by 1950's footballers. Still, you couldnt pigeon hole it as 'dodgy'. What about a new sub-category of players who need (ed) to be more imaginative about their barnets? I digress. Baldock should have done better with his 2 chances. I think Big Samuel is rapidly going to lose confidence in him. Although I am sad to say it, perhaps it was game when we needed Nolan.
Yes, maybe Nolan gees up the side even though he does go missing sometimes, and he has a knack for scoring. Baldock just needs some confidence from a goal I think, he should have got the second. Maybe Nobes is following Scotty Parker in 1950s hairstyles? I'm all in favour of the 1950s manly handshake after a goal too rather than all this chicken clucking business....
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