It's not the despair I can't take...

Well, Middlesbrough's win over Southampton means there's just that slight element of hope of making second place to keep Hammers' fans uncomfortable. A small irrational segment of my brain says what if West Ham won the last two games and the Southampton players, having all eaten dodgy lasagnes, underperformed against relegated Coventry, conceded a dodgy penalty and then couldn't get past an inspired goalkeeper. Of course this couldn't happen — could it?