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Plenty of time to use up
before the strange 4.15pm kick-off. In the Newham Bookshop Vivien tells me that
Russell Brand has finally signed her copies of Revolution and Brian Williams is signing Nearly Reach the Sky on Feb 28. Then it’s on to Ken’s Café, where after dispensing the
Spurs away tickets the talk turns to theatre as Matt, sleepless after working
the night shift, and Michael the Whovian discuss various pieces of brilliant
theatre. Nigel then recalls a pretentious show on paper folding at the
Guggenheim – which eventually folded. Time was when we just discussed burgers
and beer before a match.
As we leave DC arrives with
his wee men and Big Joe and Big Phill (sporting a mighty new moustache for his
role in The Producers) gladhand us in
Green Street. Meanwhile Fraser’s been asked to write some Western dialogue in
his creative writing class, which presumably ends up in a shoot out just to
wind up Nigel, who missed the Everton game.
There’s an initial scare when
Song passes the ball across his own box and United almost score, but from then
on West Ham are the dominant side and with Valencia and Sakho working the
channels it’s much more like the form that we showed against Manchester City
and Liverpool. Valencia gets in a good shot from the edge of the box that De
Gea does well to tip past the post. A couple of minutes later the Mancs’ keeper
makes another fine save to tip over the bar from Valencia’s volley. His best
save is an instinctive stop with his foot from Tomkins’ downward header.
HIGH KOUYATE
Kouyate looks really assured
playing at centre back — is this his best position? — and Tomkins is excellent
alongside him, despite receiving an elbow in the face from Van Persie. On
another day this might have seen the United man sent off. Strange that Mark
Clattenberg takes no action as he’s booked virtually every other player on the
pitch.
United’s only effort is a
long distance shot from Di Maria, comfortably held by Adrian. When Wayne Rooney
takes a rare United corner he doesn’t look too impressed by the Bobby Moore
Stand’s chant of “He’s just a fat granny shagger!”
After the interval West Ham
take a deserved lead. Noble’s free kick causes confusion in the box and Kouyate
juggles the ball twice before turning to volley home. In real time we’re not
aware just how skilful it was; but viewed on TV it’s a sublime goal. One-nil to
the Cockney Boys.
That goal seems to sting
United into action as Van Persie volleys straight at Adrian. Then Valencia runs
into Jones when he could have found Sakho in the box. They’re Manchester United
they don’t play on the floor… Fellaini comes on and Phil Jones and co pump an
endless succession of long balls at the big Belgian. The disappointing Falcao
finds Van Persie who shoots against the feet of Adrian.
Jarvis comes on and gets in a
great cross that for once finds his man in Mark Noble. But Nobes’ shot is a
fraction too high allowing De Gea to make another fine stop and then save from
Nolan’s second attempt. United’s best chance falls to Falcao who is played in
but pokes past the post. Is it going to our first win against United since
2007? It looks likely when we move into four minutes of added time.
ONE-ONE TO THE SURREY BOYS
United are given a free kick
on the edge of the box but mess it up. It looks like we’ve done it until yet
another long ball is lobbed into the box. Jenkinson, being pushed by Fellaini,
heads across goal and Daley Blind lashes home a fine finish into the corner to
speak delirious celebrations among the away fans, ecstatic at having gained an
away point at one of the big eight. Sod it.
There’s still time for Shaw
to get red-carded for a second yellow but we’ve played really well. We retreat
to the Central for a pint of IPA and Michael shows us his latest purchases from
the West Ham shop sale, though his WHU dog bowl has yet to be christened. It’s
a sign of progress that we’re disappointed with a point against Man United
despite lacking Collins, Reid and Carroll. But if we continue to play like this
then we still have hope of resurrecting that “Barcelona we’re coming for you!”
chant.
TEAM RATINGS: Adrian 7;
Jenkinson 7, Tomkins 8, Kouyate 8, Cresswell 7; Nolan 6, Noble 7, Song 7, Downing
6; Sakho 7, Valencia 7 (Jarvis 6).
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