Wednesday, September 2

Boring boring West Ham

Blackburn 0 West Ham 0

Breaking news: A weekend passes with no stabbings of players, no tragic deaths and no riots featuring lardy-bellied geezers from the football (pie) factory. On Sky Sports News Phil Thompson is supposed to be monitoring the match but is hopelessly disracted by the Liverpool game at Bolton.

We nearly score when Carlton bundles his way through but then fires over when well placed. They have a decent penalty claim turned down. Upson and Collins have fine games. Kieron makes it on to the pitch in the second half. Sam Allardyce looks ever more like a grumpier Les Dawson. And that's about it really. But after the week we've had, normality, tedium and an away point is welcome.

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