Noble's nerve and 'Moyes magic' earn thumping win

West Ham 4 (four) Bournemouth 0

The Irons are in the relegation zone at kick-off, but at least there's a full turn-out from our group. Clacton foul-weather supporters Alison and Scott are back, as are Fraser, who has been talked down from his one-man protest on top of the ArcelorMittal Orbit, Michael, Nigel and Matt, to whom I hand the Guardian's Harry Styles interview as requested by Lisa, who wants it for 'a friend'. Matt suggests that West Ham are also only going in One Direction.

There's a muted atmosphere at the start as the crowd seem to be weighing up the new Moyes regime and a few gaps left by refuseniks. But Moyes has sensibly told the players to concentrate on winning the crowd over. Seeing Noble steam into some tackles and set up Fornals for a chance sets the tone. The sensible tweak of playing Anderson in a free role behind Haller is also working well.

After 17 minutes the breakthrough arrives. Anderson finds Snodgrass with a lovely reverse pass and the Scot pulls it back to the edge of the box for Noble to stroke home via a hefty deflection off Steve Cook. Still, you make your own luck by getting shots away.

There's a brief scare after VAR investigates a possible penalty given away by Ogbonna but the verdict is no foul. It gets better. Fredericks crosses and Haller acrobatically volleys home a brilliant goal. That's what we paid £45 million for. 

NOBLE CAUSE
Incredibly we go three up after 35 minutes. Noble makes a determined run into the box and wins a penalty which he calmly strokes home. Moyes has not read the script; we are supposed to go three goals down at home before we start playing.

Seeing the side win 50-50 tackles is astonishing and shows just how low things had got under Pellegrini. Manuel must also be having a rueful smile watching this, wondering why such lavishly-rewarded players didn't put in such a shift for him. Bournemouth are injury-ravaged and take 44 minutes to have a shot. But they have recently beaten Chelsea and drawn with Arsenal, so can't be that bad. And normally WHU roll over for any team on a bad run.

But still the home fans are worried, as we recall losing three-goal leads to Wimbledon and West Brom. In the Ladies at half-time Alison meets a fan who is waiting to use her 'lucky cubicle' — you can't be too careful where WHU are concerned.

The second half sees Bournemouth have more possession after two substitutions but Ogbonna is resolute at the back and Rice has a fine game in front of the back four. On 66 minutes Declan plays a fantastic through ball for Anderson, who kills it with a piece of brilliant control and runs on to slot past Ramsdale. That's the goal he needed. Felipe goes down on his knees to pray to God or VAR as He is otherwise known. After a nervous pause the goal is given. Fraser says he never doubted Captain Moyes for a second.

Proof that things are going WHU's way comes when Cresswell correctly has a red card changed to a yellow by VAR and Solanke's header bounces off the post into Fabianski's arms. Encouragingly Haller is bullying the Bournemouth defenders, something someone with his physique needs to do more of. 

Lanzini comes on and has a close-range header superbly parried by Ramsdale. Astonishingly every West Ham pass is now being greeted by cries of "ole!" as a superb move ends with Fornals shooting too close to the keeper. What a difference four days makes.

WE'VE WON AT HOME!
Matt suggest we collectively break our alcohol-free January vows to celebrate with a pint or two. All across London Veganuary is surely ending as the meat-free tuck into cheesesteaks. The unprecedented has happened. 

The atmosphere in the Refreshment Rooms is full of unusual bonhomie as Nigel recounts a list of his favourite Carry On films and reveals that CQ thought we should never have got rid of Moyes. The BBC is referring to "Moyes magic". Fraser says he found all this negativity about the new manager very strange. When it's suggested that if A Yeti (aka Ajeti) scores Moyes really will have worked some magic, Michael quips, "I wouldn't like Tibet on it". Finally the real cause of our success is revealed — Nigel has forgotten to eat his lucky banana at half-time.

We're unbeaten this decade. It's West Ham's biggest Premier League home victory since 2007. We've waited since September for this and can finally bask in the glow of a thumping victory — at least until we play Gillingham on Sunday. Irons!

PLAYER RATINGS: Fabianski 6; Fredericks 7, Balbuena 7, Ogbonna 8,  Cresswell 7; Snodgrass 8, Rice 8, Noble 9, Fornals 7 (Masuaku 7); Anderson 8 (Lanzini 7), Haller 8.