Thursday, January 8

Dog day afternoon

"No disrespect but we are at a club where we can't deal in the top bracket of players we would like to bring here.You are always working below that. We are not at Crufts, we are at Battersea Dogs Home. We are looking for strays. We are looking for people who have gone astray with the aim of bringing them back. You look for players who have gone off the rails and for whatever reason have not fulfilled their potential." Stoke boss Tony Pulis after taking a punt on Matthew Etherington.

So West Ham is the Premiership's answer to Battersea Dogs Home. Are we now a home for waifs and strays? Is Pulis travelling all stations to Barking? If we can flog Great Dane Davenport to Bolton and pit bull terrier Lee Bowyer to Birmingham we just might keep Green (a solid retriever), Upson (pedigree chum), wuff diamond Craig Bellamy (always yapping) and Scotty Dog Parker.

There's even a rumour that Hull might pay £2 million for Luis Boa Morte... although they may rue the fact that an erratic left winger is for life not just the transfer window.


matt said...

I think you have misunderstood the metaphor - Stoke are Battersea Dogs Home, collecting all the unawanted waifs and strays - and we saw the other week how they play like a bunch of snarling pitbulls, even turning on each other. So that makes us Cruft's - only the elite, pedigree, valuable creatures allowed. And Luis, as of now. So while Bellars may look like a yappy, snarly, irritating little dog, he's actually priceless. Or £12 million, if you are Mark Hughes.

The real question is who travels on the plane to Newcastle, as that will separate the sheep from the goats, to mix animal metaphors. If Davenport, LBM, Bowyer etc are really about to move on, they won't be there, and the same goes for Parker, Upson, Bellamy and Green.

Pete May said...

If Stoke are Battersea Dogs Home then that makes us the piece of wasteground on which emaciated and cruelly-treated strays are found.In fact Stoke provide them with a chance of finding a caring owner...

Bolton will only sign Head on a Stick if they don't get some other geezer, but good chance LBM is going to Hull and back and Bowyer to Brum. Hope Upson and co don't have Matty-style "flu" on Saturday.