Inside the London Stadium we find Nigel and his lucky Stranglers plastic bag, CQ, Matt, Lisa, Big Sam (who successfully relegated Leeds three years ago) and Michael the Whovian, who is still recovering from the excitement of viewing the two missing episodes of The Daleks' Master Plan
One home game from Wembley, what could possibly go wrong? After the international break there's no Hermansen, Wan-Bissaka, Greek Bloke or Todibo, while Soucek is only on the bench, Summerville is not yet ready and Callum Wilson is also missing. Everyone is worried by the inclusion of Max Kilman, though perhaps he'll be better alongside Disasi.
After three minutes Areola has to make a good save to deny Okafor. Then Bowen gets in a great low cross and Perri has to make a brilliant low save from Taty's flick. Adama Traore shows his speed to power through midfield and pass to Bowen, who forces another decent save, with Traore failing to follow up.
But slowly Leeds start to look the better side, with Magassa and Potts struggling to contain their midfield and Walker-Peters being tormented by Okafor. Leeds take the lead when Tanaka twists and turns in the box and shoots against Disasi, the ball deflecting up and in off the crossbar. The 9000 Leeds fans celebrate wildly.
Nigel goes early and eats his lucky banana while the Hammers are lucky not to concede a penalty when Potts can only play the ball towards Okafor and Kilman catches Stach after he's got his shot away.
At the break Nuno takes off Potts and Magassa for Soucek and Pablo and West Ham give it more of a go. Traore is breaking clear when he's cynically fouled by Ampadu, who gets a fully-deserved yellow card. Traore has switched to the left and gets in a great cross that Castellanos heads against the post when he should probably score. The home crowd ramp up the atmosphere.
But on 71 minutes Max Kilman makes a clumsy challenge and takes out Aaronson in the box. VAR correctly rules that it's a penalty. Sub Dominic Calvert-Lewin converts and it seems it's game over. Kilman is booed by his own fans when he next touches the ball which isn't going to help anyone. The Leeds fans chant about going to Wembley.
Some West Ham fans head for the exits. Leeds almost make it three but at least Traore is still sending over inviting crosses. Meanwhile Matt is perhaps in need of a wellness trip to San Francisco as he lambasts Nuno, Pablo, Taty, Kilman and cheating Leeds
But the announcement of 11 added minutes gives us some hope. Pablo heads over from Diouf's cross. Three minutes into added time the indefatigable Bowen turns inside to fire a great drive against the post and Fernandes is able to tuck home the rebound. Surely we can't come back?
AXEL ROSE
Two minutes later Traore gets another great cross in the box and there is Axel Disasi who does a karate kick on the ball to slide it home. Axel rose brilliantly. He celebrates like he's won the World Cup again, as the West Ham fans go effing mental. That goal is for the diehards who stayed. None of us ever doubted Nuno's team selection, much. Those who left early are not being allowed back in. "You're not singing anymore!" is chanted at the Leeds fans, no longer marching on together.
So it's extra time. Nigel makes the mistake or going to the gents and West Ham seem to score in the first minute. Perri fluffs his clearance and Taty Castellanos cleverly lobs it back into the net from a tight angle. Cure wild celebrations until sodding VAR rules that he was offside by a shoulder.
Gnonto skies a chance for Leeds before Bowen rattles the post with another great effort. Pablo nets the rebound but has drifted offside. There's still time in the first period for Traore to set up Diouf who slices his shot way wide.
On come Scarles and Kante. Legs are tired but Kante does well to power into the box to shoot wide and Pablo misses a half-chance. There's another sub-plot when Areola injures himself getting under Aaronson's cross. He's taken off and on comes 20-year-old Finlay Herrick, who has only ever played on loan at Boreham Wood. We wonder why Hermansen is not on the bench.
Luckily Herrick doesn't have to make any serious saves for his five minutes and then it's penalties. Incredibly Herrick saves the first penalty from Piroe and we're looking forward to tomorrow's headlines. But then a tired Jarrod Bowen takes a poor penalty that is saved by Perri. Walker-Peters and Soucek score for the Irons while Leeds net their next two although Herrick gets a hand to Gnonto's shot.
Matt has a very bad feeling about Pablo taking the fourth spot kick and is confirmed correct when Perri saves his tame effort. It's left to Struijk to send Leeds off to Wembley.
It's been a great cup tie for the cameras, though as Nigel remarks, losing and extra time is the worst possible result for the Hammers with a vital game coming up on Friday. We head off to the Eagle concentrating on the league.
We conduct a straw poll of whether we're going down or not. Some think we're going down on goal difference. I'm one of the few to regard my glass of Guinness as half-full, as if we can beat Wolves then we still have a good chance of survival. Nigel gets out his mental computer and says we have to win at either Palace or Brentford. We then discuss the advantages of playing in the Championship, which includes a better chance of away tickets and going to Lincoln.
The biggest game of the week is still Wolves on Friday. Perhaps Leeds will become distracted by a trip to Wembley? We have to hope that Summerville is fit and Harmansen, the Greek Bloke, Todibo, Wilson and Wan-Bissaka are back for Wolves. But there's hope in the spirit we showed against Leeds. Traore had his best game for the club and Disasi was again immense. It's not over yet.
PLAYER RATINGS: Areola 6 (Herrick 7); Walker-Peters 4, Disasi 8, Kilman 4, Diouf 6 (Scarles 5); Potts 4 (Soucek 6), Magassa 4 (Pablo 4), Fernandes 6; Bowen 8, Castellanos 6 (Kante 6), Traore 8 (Mayers n/a).
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